Wednesday, 23 May 2012

Butt Seriously!!!


        While I celebrated my sequel, created to tide over my bouts of intransigence, by visiting the nearest Ganesh mandir and breaking a coconut (gathering the pieces carefully later), the UPA decided to celebrate the anniversary of their sequel by having a 'Dine and Dias' show (they decided against a sound and light show due to austerity measures).  So I had the opportunity to watch the glee on Arnab's face while Navika was incessantly driveling on the position of Mulayam's Butt at various time lines during the show (a la the new profile page of Facebook). She screamed into the camera, that at the beginning it was next to Chidambaram, and then voila, during dinner it was next to Sonia! (I happened to catch Arnab just managing to sit back after he had fallen of his chair in excitement, when the camera panned onto him)
             Now, I must confess, that though I am not an intellectual, who being a song writer or sports journalist, could come on Arnabs show and comment on multifarious subjects ranging from the new BPL benchmark to India's preparedness of the nuclear triad as a deterrant,  I do understand the importance of Tashreef Rakhiye in Lucknow parlance.  But what i failed to understand was that, how the tashreef, which Mulayam had so graciously brought  from Lucknow, was a matter of national importance and interest, and how its position in the national capital during an event, which the whole nation was following with bated breath would decide the fate of this great nation.
           I was then enlightened by the intellectuals on the panel, that this tashreef assumed great significance as it was carefully positioned as a countermeasure to a bong who had gone bonkers (now i thought bongs dont have to go bonkers, they are just manufactured that way, but that is another story).  I was also informed by this elite panel that it even had the powers to decide the next President of India! 
         (Now this reminded me of an old joke, where the different parts of the body argued as to who should be the Boss. The brain said that since he controlled the entire operations, he should be the boss. The heart said that since he ensured regular supply of blood to the brain, he should be the boss. The stomach said that since he provided the energy for both the earlier contestants to perform he should be the boss. The lungs argued that since they are the ones who decided whether the entity should be alive, they should be Boss. The asshole wanted to contest, but then the others laughed at him so much that he felt offended and decided not to function any more. In no time, the stomach couldn't do his job, the brain got clogged, the heart felt weak and the lungs found the going difficult. So they all decided to let the asshole decide the future course of action and anointed him as the Boss.)

     So we now have a Tashreef who will decide the Head of this poor Nation!!!!

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